(Sorry my post is a bit late. I had laptop issues.)
Uh oh… Elijah told George about him sleeping with Marnie and George breaks up with him. Who’s gonna pay his bills? I think the Elijah and Marnie 1, 2 thruster is what eventually will lead to Hannah and Elijah “breaking up.” If you haven’t read my previous posts (SHAME ON YOU) it has been announced that Andrew Rannells is leaving the show so he can focus on NBC’s The New Normal. So… it’s just a matter of time until Hannah finds out and the shit will hit that fan, people.
Finally the moment we’ve all been waiting for. We’ve seen it on all the promos : Adam’s gmailed video to Hannah. Remember John Cusack with a boom box over his head in Say Anything? Now imagine if John Cusack was super creepy singing a ‘love song’ on a YouTube video, shirtless, and with a bunch of carpentry tools behind him? That would best describe Adam’s video to Hannah…
“Standing outside. Not making a sound. Creeping around. You destroyed my heart. Thanks.”
I’d be flattered if that song was sent to me. I mean I’d rather get videos from a creeper than date a republican. Yep. Sandy is a republican.
My wish has come true! Shosh and Ray are now together and it is so cute. I mean they are having a conversation about bathing pigs. It doesn’t get any cuter than that. I want a movie being made about these two. That’s how much I love them together. Every time that we’ve seen Ray previously, he’s been real cynical or sarcastic but in this episode he’s ridiculously sweet and it’s a joy to see. I. LOVE. IT!
Marnie is job hunting and goes on an interview with an employer that is best described as strange but doesn’t get a job offer. The world has enough art curators. Instead Shoshanna gets Marnie a hookup for a job as a “hostess or something in a club.”
Jess and Thomas-John are officially back from their honeymoon, matching primitive tattoos and all. Hannah goes to visit them and Thomas-John calls her “Danna”, twice, but no one notices. I barely caught it. I had to put on closed captioning just to make sure I was hearing him right. As a gift he bought Jessa three puppies who are “fetus-sized.” She names them Garbage (Pug), Fucker (Maltese), and Hannah names the third one Hanukah (Chihuahua).
Jessa tells Hannah that she’s never been this well in her life. Good for her… but will it last? Hannah mentions how she really likes Sandy but he’s a Republican to which Jessa replies that Republicans and democrats are all dirt bags (truth!) and that Clinton was the one who got rid of the Glass-Steagall Act… Who would’ve thought that carefree, bohemian Jessa would know anything about politics? Especially about an act dealing with banks in the year 1933 and was repealed when we were preteens. I guess she read a newspaper, just one. According to Jessa what’s important is not a party affiliation but whether he supports her creativity. Hannah says he supports her but she gave him her essays three days prior and he hadn’t read them yet because he’s been busy “with studying and stuff.” OK. Jessa calls bullshit, as do I, and gives Hannah some sage advice- “If he’s not reading your essays, he’s not reading you.”
Back at Sandy’s house, Hannah brings up the Essays but he says he’s been busy. He then admits that he did read it but “it wasn’t for me, exactly.” Hannah says it doesn’t bother her that he didn’t like it but it clearly does. She breaks up with him but blames it on his GOP ways. Before the break up though, she asks him how he feels about the fact that 2 out of 3 people on death row are black men. She said this to a BLACK MAN! She also quotes a Missy Elliot song but claims she doesn’t know who Missy Elliot is (Work It: “Lay this thing down, flip it, and reverse it.” She is such a hot mess. Sandy tells her that she should leave so of course her response is to ask if he still wants to have sex. I repeat. Hannah is a hot mess! I think this may be it for Sandy. Goodbye only black character of the show.
Marnie goes to Elijah’s and Hannah’s looking for Hannah and Elijah questions her motive. They have a little tiff about whether or not to tell Hannah but Elijah makes Marnie agree to not telling her. Marnie is dressed in her new uniform…
apparently she got that hostess gig. After taking a good look at Marnie, Elijah delivers my favorite line of the episode “What the fuck are you wearing? You look like a slutty Von Trapp child.”
Hannah is in bed watching a YouTube video on how to cut bangs… that’s a disaster waiting to happen. Luckily she gets a text before she can cut the hair. The text is from Creepy McCreeperson (Adam, if you didn’t figure it out) saying he’s downstairs. She shuts the computer and turns the light off and he replies “I saw you turn your lights off.” She’s lying in bed quietly hoping he goes away. But does he? Of course not! HE’S IN HER HOUSE and scares her by yelling “Cinco De Mayo!” LOLOLOL He’s in her house because she gave him a key. Rule number 1 in the “I’m dating a psycho handbook”, you NEVER give a house key to your sociopath boyfriend. As a precaution, Hannah dials 9-1-1 on her and then decides against it so she quickly hangs up.
The cops show up anyway. Hilarity ensues with a white-trash argument in front of the cops about restraining orders and how she was thinking about getting one on him. Adam says he should have gotten a restraining order against her for showing up at his house “in knee socks and a Jason mask.” Knee socks and a Jason Mask!!! I’ve said it twice already but it fits here as well. Hannah is a hot mess! The cops ask for Adam’s name and arrest him when they realize he has two unpaid parking tickets and an ignored summons for public urination. Public urination? What’s with this boy and peeing?
The sneak peek for the next episode shows Hannah talking about getting cocaine. Homegirl will procure some booger sugar. This should be fun!
What are your thoughts about Season 2 so far? Leave a comment below or hit me up on twitter @LinzLooWho
Follow @tvfishbowl for your Television, Movie, Celebrity, Pop Culture, and Gossip scoop— TVFishBowl (@TVFishBowl) April 9, 2013