Married To The Army: Alaska “Knock At The Door” Nov 26th

Brian makes Blair her first Mother’s Day breakfast.  He knows she’s going to critique him, but it’s going to be fun, he chuckles.  “To nag is to love,” she says.  It’s a happy and complicated time all at once.  Breakfast talk is honest talk.  There’s mutual irritation since he’s been back, but she doesn’t want him to feel left out of the family. Collin has changed a lot from being the 3 month old Brian left 6 months ago.

Yolanda begins the mornings with mixed feelings.  She’s off to get her son from the airport, but the Brigade has suffered two more KIA’s (Killed In Action).  Another blackout is in effect so no Mother’s Day calls for the wives.  Cameron Goins is 20 years old and a junior at West Point Military Academy.  Yolanda needs him right now and their hug is so precious.  We see her tears of relief and a huge smile on her face.  The casualties make her question if she can endure her only child going to war.  It’s different sending her husband.  Your baby is your baby.  Now she has someone to lean on during this hard time.  Cameron asks her how she’s doing.  She says she has her private cry, then puts on her game face so she can be strong for her husband and the families.  Yolanda is an Army brat with both parents being career enlisted soldiers.  She was not going to marry a military man, but 2 weeks after meeting Morris Goins, he was the one.  Cameron tells her he wants to marry his girlfriend in two years.  She’s a little overwhelmed by this development.  

Yolanda, father and son have a Skype session together.  He sounds tired and weary.  Seeing his two most important people together hopefully did some good.  He’ll be home for his R&R in nine days, but Cameron has to leave now.  I’m sad for Yolanda, being alone and far away from her guys.  She can now accept that Cameron is going to follow his father into the Army.  If someone has to go to war, why shouldn’t it be her son?

Brian has a recorded firefight to share.  Blair watches with some reservation.  He tells her what’s going on and it’s sobering to see.  This is his way of sharing what he’s experiencing with her.  Blair says the worrying is the hardest part, but you have to stop thinking of the risks to keep your sanity.  She tells Brian to read Collin a story tonight and he’s hesitant.  It seems that he feels like a visitor.  They’re both doing a great job with the specter of his return to Afghanistan in the air.  They talk out the fears, excitement, resentment and changes since Brian first deployed.  They didn’t sugar coat or withdraw from each other.  The truth, when spoken from a place of love, doesn’t hurt so much.  

Brian attempts to feed the baby.  Collin cries and Blair steps in.  He calms immediately.  Brian is crushed and blames himself.  Blair assures him that he did fine and the baby is just used to his routine.  She cries because she wants things to be perfect.  He comforts her and says it takes time. He’s not offended.  Blair thinks this isn’t a life for anyone.  Who thinks it’s a great idea to get married, have a baby and peace out?  “We’re doing it.”  At their dinner date, Blair doesn’t want war or baby talk.  Brian asks about her mirror project.  She is into interior design but has put it on the back burner after Collin and the deployment.  He wants her to know that he doesn’t expect her to stop her career for him.  If you had told Blair when she met him, that this was going to happen, she would have run as fast as she could in the opposite direction.  They’ve successfully reconnected but it’s time to suit up and go.  Blair and Brian say their tearful goodbyes on the curb and then he disappears through the doors.  “I don’t want to go home alone.”  Blair says while wiping tears.  

Sara’s biggest fear is that one day she’ll have to answer her son’s “Where is D?” question with, “He’s not coming home.”  After 5 days of blackout, her heart drops every time the doorbell rings.  Sara says Dusty had basic training, but she didn’t get military life training.  Sara props her front door open so she can see if ‘that car’ pulls up. She doesn’t want her neighbors to know first.  You’re not alone with that.  She hears from her husband and he is upset and angry over the loss of someone he knew well in his company.  Sara is too.  The Dunlap’s had a normal life as a working couple, but his dream was to join the Army.  He was thirty pounds heavier, sported sideburns, long curly hair and worked in a cubicle.  “That man’s gone for sure,” she says in a quiet shaky voice.  She doesn’t get how people do this over and over and they have to get out of the Army.  

Yolanda gets a call from her husband and she’s not going to burden him with things going on at home.  Everything is good.  He chuckles and says he can feel the weight riding on her shoulders from over there.  Relationships aren’t 50/50, Yolanda says, it’s 90/10 with them and she’s happy to get her 10 with no bitterness.  

“Sometimes inside your knees are buckling, but yet, when it’s required, you stand strong as a mighty warrior.  That’s what a soldier is.  That’s what Army wives are.” 

Tags: afghanistan, army, basic training, blackout, blair flanagan, brian flanagan, cameron, cameron goins, firefight, interior design, Knock At The Door, married to the army, married to the army alaska, morris goins, OWN, R&R, sara dunlap, Skype, traci, War, west point military academy, yolanda goins